Monthly Archives: September 2012

Precocious

Posted on September 28, 2012 by Alicia Louise

I ended up in the ER last night with a 39 degree fever. I felt as miserable as I ever have; my throat felt like it was pierced with daggers, my head felt like it’d been bludgeoned, I was chilled … Continue reading →

Posted in chemo days, Clinical trials, Indignities of the human body | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Learning curve

Posted on September 27, 2012 by Alicia Louise

I don’t know the total number of months that I spent in treatment in my life, but one would think it was enough that I would know what warrants a call to the nurse and what can wait until the … Continue reading →

Posted in Clinical trials, Indignities of the human body | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

Adjustment

Posted on September 24, 2012 by Alicia Louise

My throat is sore and I am tired. I slept nearly 12 hours last night. I do not think any of these things have to do with Friday’s chemo, but if I were to say to someone my throat hurts … Continue reading →

Posted in chemo days, Clinical trials | Tagged , | 4 Comments

The day after

Posted on September 22, 2012 by Alicia Louise

I made it through and it wasn’t bad. The day was long — I was at the hospital at 9 a.m. and didn’t leave until 5:30 p.m. — but it was long with waiting, not long with treatment. I started … Continue reading →

Posted in Clinical trials, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | 7 Comments

The night before

Posted on September 20, 2012 by Alicia Louise

Tomorrow the trial starts. I don’t know what to say about that, so I won’t say anything. There is a small spider that lives on my desk. I sit down to work or write and instead I watch it weave … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 8 Comments

Start it up

Posted on September 11, 2012 by Alicia Louise

There’s not much to say about a state of calm. It’s pretty static, pretty even. Also, it can be so enjoyable that I don’t want to write anything. I simply want to swim in the calm. I’m through the latest … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Unfamiliar

Posted on September 5, 2012 by Alicia Louise

Today in therapy I realized that starting a clinical trial means getting a whole new medical team. This fact had flitted across my mind a few times since I made my treatment decision on Friday, but I’d been batting it … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments